A Little T&A (NSFW)

I have mixed feelings about mixing Lego and erotic themes, which is nothing new under the sun, people have been combining the two since the phallic space-ships of Bonktron debuted over eleven years ago.   It probably goes back even further but that’s the first ‘adult’ series of models I can remember.  Even MOCpages, went through a prolonged stretch in the mid 2000’s when the height of humor was sig-figs sodomizing each other with hotdogs…I’m sure you can imagine the sheer hilarity of it all…  It’s not just the guys who get in on the erotic action, Janey Gunning showed us some in whips and chains back in 2006.  As long as adults have been building with Lego, there have been sexual themes.

I don’t object to the adult stuff based on any moral objections or hand-wringing over what the “children” might see.  I admit that I get a little squeamish when I see minifigs engaging in sexual situations, because of the stigma attached to us by the outside world about  men (primarily) who play with a children’s toy.  Showing minifigs boning just throws fuel on that fire and more often than not it doesn’t serve any larger scene or idea, it exists purely to be provocative. This is one of the worst examples, I can’t endorse this image in any way, it’s skeevy, and barely qualifies as a build.  In a stereotypically American way, I don’t have a problem with minifig violence, but showing little dolls having sex is not something I’m want to see. To me, minifig-sex works best when the action is more suggestive than overt.

Once you get away from the minifigs though, I don’t have any reservations at all.  I enjoy watching builders struggle with the human form and the challenge of turning plastic parts into something sexy.  My final objection is that most erotically themed builds are terrible, there is often little thought put into their construction because the builder is too busy giggling about boners or trying to decide which porno to watch next.  I’ve never seen a Bonktron ship that wasn’t absolute crap and all that sausage humor on MOCpages was mediocre at best, it was the same basic idea repeated over and over. For every Letranger Absurde, Ian Heath or Bricks Noir, there are a hundred hacks who don’t really try to make something compelling, just provocative.

All that is a long-winded way to work my way around to a builder who should be familiar to most of you, Bricks Noir.  What separates the builder from the crowd who indulge in erotica is the skill level.  This kind of SNOT work has a high degree of difficulty whether it’s built in the brick or in this case, digitally.  In Bricks Noir’s latest impressive work, “Classic Curves“, it isn’t the anatomy that interests me so much as the Mustang badge on the grill and the subtle curves of the fenders and mirrors.  Sure the lady is attractive, the legs are extremely well done, but everywhere you look in the image you’ll find some delightful detail.   If you slapped a frame on this one and hung it in a coffee joint people wouldn’t know it was Lego, even when they got up close. Sexy and scary are two of the most difficult themes to capture in the brick I can’t commend the builder enough for capturing sexy like no other.29345890883_4c3d0467fc_o

Bricks Noir is one of those rare builders who seemed to spring to life fully formed (like a Greek god) with advanced skills and no awkward initial builds.  Such instant success tends breed suspicion, especially when the builder in question is relatively quiet and provides no information in their profile.  The most clever blogger on TBB, Ian Heath, speculated last year that  Bricks Noir is a pseudonym for an “established builder” but as usual, the big blog would rather play coy about it than make a statement or even an educated guess.  I’m a conspiracy theory guy, so that makes me think it’s probably the clever blogger himself.  Heath certainly has the skill-level to pull it off, and he likes mixing butt cheeks and Lego, so until proven otherwise, I’ll go with Mr. clever.  I would love to hear your take on the true identity of Bricks Noir in the comments, or if you think there is no conspiracy at all.

I can’t help but wonder how far Bricks Noir  will push the envelope in a genre he basically owns.  Will we be looking at blow-jobs and golden showers by this time next year?  Is uncensored erotica something you want to see more of, constant reader?  Is there a line that shouldn’t be crossed?  I kind of hope he or she goes in that direction because the pearl-clutching and moral outrage by the true-believer Lego cultists and the general public would be a wonderful spectacle to behold.

I went down some nasty rabbit-holes while exploring the topic for this article and it almost turned into a long-form Omnibus post because there is so much content.  In the end though, as I complained above, very little of the content was quality building and I thought it would be better to leave the focus on the incredible work of Bricks Noir.  I will leave you with two links, the first is a group (NSFW) on Flickr that specializes in all things erotica, and the second link is to perhaps the strangest thing I found in my research, a customizable Lego butt-plug (very NSFW) which may be the strangest Lego related aftermarket product that I’ve seen.

22 thoughts on “A Little T&A (NSFW)

  1. I have enjoyed and admired Bricks Noir’s work. I was not aware of those (juvenile, inevitable) older trends. I see one builder’s brick-built human females and I almost want to barf, they are so overtly degrading to my eyes. But this is someone who simply loves the form they are challenging themselves to reproduce as faithfully as possible, in a way most convincing and pleasing to the eye, under the harsh constraints of an interlocking brick system. No mean feat. Better to aim high and fail than to succeed at mediocrity!

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    1. Well said, Bricks Noir aims high and always seems to hit the bulls-eye. I’ve never understood the appeal of Bonktron…I guess you really have to be in touch with your inner 13-year old and I don’t hear from him that often anymore. He was a jerk anyway.

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  2. I always thought these were real bricks.I don’t think it’s just the rendering, their sheer scale must have something to do with it too.

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    1. I thought they were brick-built for the longest time, I think it fools most people, judging by the comments. I wonder how much he/she could sell these for if they were brick, probably a good deal of money.

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  3. Quite some time ago, I recall a European builder doing some incarnations of Botticelli’s paintings and others under the Medici patronage umbrella. They were of the same midi-scale that Soren did his anime gunfighters in, making them large enough to coax out some curves that resembled human form. They were primarily nudes in the Florentine Renaissance style, so wider hips, plumper calves etc than the Greek classic ideal. Perhaps because the inspiration was ‘high art’, they never seemed to tread that uncomfortable path of sexual depiction using a child’s toy – they came off more as classical art in an unconventional medium. Wish I could find the link. Apologies.

    Don’t take this as an invitation to the whole ‘what is art’ discussion, since my experience is most people have made up their own minds where art begins and ends and no length or passion of discourse will convince them otherwise. Nor should it. I only bring it up as a personal observation which like all reaction to creative endevours, says just as much (if not more) about the viewer as the work presented or artist’s intent.

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    1. Whoah, somebody has to track that down, that sounds both unique and amazing. Maybe one of our constant readers will remember the builder, I have to admit it’s hard to imagine what that would look like in the brick. You don’t see too many female forms attempted beyond the cone-breasted super babes.

      I couldn’t agree more with you about the ‘art’ argument, I think that much like beauty, it’s in the eye of the beholder. I think Lego is more like a craft than an art (with exceptions) but I’ll accept just about any answer to that question. It’s not black and white like cosplaying at a Lego con.

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  4. Independent from the chosen motive Brick Noir manages to achieve extremely organic shapes and poses. I, for myself, enjoy the less offensive motives more. The more subtle pictures give more room for imagination.

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  5. It’s interesting how he started out with more innocent subjects like the mudflap girl and slowly started pushing the boundaries with builds like “Lover’s Moon.” I find his masterful replication of the human form (just look at the rib cage on “Modern Siren”!) to be less off-putting than some of the more cartoony interpretations out there, which seem a little too “horny fourteen-year-old boy” for my tastes.

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    1. That progression is precisely why I posed the question about what we’ll be seeing from him in a year or three. How far will he go? Unlike most of the people who engage in adult themes, I’m genuinely excited to see where he takes it, even if it is in a more explicit direction. He tackles the topic with a maturity that most builders can’t muster.

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  6. I’m all for art and making bricks into whatever you please. However, that butt plug hot link burned my retinas.
    Some of the builds are interesting like those you noted, but the content isn’t compelling to me. I like subtle sexy and some adult humor but, just like real life, the hardcore stuff isn’t for me.
    It gives me that uncomfortable feeling like when someone puts a dick on Bart Simpson. No offense, just not for me.
    Now Bugs Bunny in drag…that’s good shit.

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    1. Yeah, I debated on including that link, because I’m pretty sure just looking at the image gave me Chlamydia. Believe me though, that was not the worst of the stuff that is out there, on Flickr alone…I never thought I could feel sorry for a minifig…

      Yeah, I’m right there with you, I’m no prude but I don’t like it when people sexualize something made primarily for kids. That’s my objection to the brony thing. I know adults can do whatever they want, but why mix it with something that already has an identity with children? Maybe I would feel differently if I didn’t have kids, but I doubt it.

      Drag is cool, just not drag in kid’s clothes.

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  7. Needless to say how much I enjoy these… I find it amusing how rarely such subjects are approached properly in lego, rather than just for the sake of cheap shock. It almost seems like the builds are intentionally done poorly when handling the subject.

    Then again, give the amount of war and violence going on in builds, it’s downright silly how sensuality is still a no-go.

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    1. Perfectly said, it’s a shame that the builders like you and Heath and Noir are the extreme exception of builders who can give the topic a ‘serious’ treatment. Serious in terms of effort and technique.

      I think that’s an American thing….kill maim and torture, but no titties…think of the children!

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      1. yeah it weird how America is the most “free” country but gets butthurt by real human sex. Must be the Puritan roots.

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  8. Oh hey no one’s commented on the conspiracy theory yet. I doubt it’s Heath on the grounds that he made a long-winded post about digital builds not being legitimate MOCs or some such on his blog a couple years back. This from the guy who sharpies eyes on whatever his latest meme build is. Not that I have a problem with that (I’m not a purist by any means), but it does strike me as hypocritical. But then a lot of self-proclaimed purists are.

    Working backwards from some sort of motive for anonymity, I posit that Bricks Noir is actually one of the high-profile Christian builders. My guess is Sean Mayo. What we see above is everything he’s always secretly wanted to build behind Steph’s back and their bricks being packed away for the big move was the perfect opportunity to pick up LDD. Sean & Steph’s last post until very recently was in November last year, the same time Bricks Noir appeared. Coincidence? I think not.

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    1. Your guess is probably the better one, I just love to reference Mr. clever whenever I can so I was probably biased. I remember being disappointed when I saw some his stuff in person, he makes a lot of compromises while trying to keep up the veneer of everything being ‘lego pure’. Also, all that Kardashian, topical pop-culture shit seems like pandering. Sure it’s done well, but everything that guy does seems calculated to generate the most stats.

      Also, it seems kind of sad though that somebody would have to hide under a pseudonym to not be associated with a subject matter.

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      1. Yeah I sometimes wonder how many people unfave his a week later when they’re not relevant anymore. And I’ve never been a fan of the awkward, inorganic shapes in his figures.

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  9. I have absolutely loved Noir’s stuff from day one with the mudflap girl. I thought that was just plain fun, nothing provocative, just something we’ve all seen in real life and now in Lego. But then he started creating the sexy bomber art and it blew me away as I’ve always been a huge fan of Elvgren, Vargas, and Olivia style artwork. And as someone that has painted, drawn and sculpted the human form, I can easily relate to how fucking difficult it is to do.

    Noir builds such subtlety into the ACTUAL form regardless of an errant nipple showing or implied sex. The tilt of a hip or the small fold of skin as the body twists, they are always there and always right. A tough lesson to learn in drawing the human form is to draw what you see, not what you know. There is an idealized image in all our heads that informs our hands what to draw to be pleasing, the golden mean of organic form. But it never ends up right or even close to realistic. They almost always end up looking like super heroes or Playboy models. When you draw what you see in front of you, it takes on a life and an identifiable gesture. Slouch, pudginess, imperfections, scrawniness, Those are real attributes of every human body and they are more engaging to the human eye than the supermodel/superman, chiseled features loaded, comic book ideals.

    In life drawing classes, we would always have male and female nudes that were for the most part ideal, usually athletic and slender and closer to that mental form. And they were hardly challenging to draw. But once in a while, we would get a woman or man that was obese or skeletal and then it was fucking game on! They were brutal to draw because it worked against your brain every time. The images were unflattering, grotesque, and frustrating. Perfect! Hell, on the ideal models, I would tangent off and concentrate on just feet and hands, those are always a damn bitch. And that’s kind of what I would love to see Noir try his hand at for future builds. Sexy is great and I will always love that, but the non sexy, realistic, and imperfect is what I would see as a galactic leap forward. It would also challenge the viewer against their own ideals. More so than the butt plug there, that shit’s just one of those things that you knew was coming put just didn’t want to. Hopefully, we can now move on from that as well as the Bonktron, and those retarded clones on plates with a hot dog. It’s not old, it’s not provocative, it’s not expressive, it’s just insulting. I love a good fart joke like the next guy, but that stuff is utterly boring. No conversation needed or worth the effort.

    Noir’s work engages and is actually extremely trick as far as techniques go. Regardless of cultural prudishness, this is something that needs to be studied and admired. The human form in Lego is mind blowing, the fact that he does it with such skill is nothing short of genius. And it’s not the body that people should be offended about but rather the mind inside it. The human form is a beautiful thing in all shapes and sizes, having a Lego dumpster fire come out of one end or the other is not.

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  10. but what if he has a 2-D program that runs and optimizes these MOCs and just spits them out. It’s not inconceivable that someone could build a program to convert a cartoon image into a 2-D mosaic composed of shapes juxtaposed as lego would be.

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    1. Exactly, man. How do we know robots aren’t the ones writing all the music on the radio or feeding us the news? Is this blog even real?

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